Thursday, August 14, 2008
Monday starts a new year of school. The two dear sweet little pumpkins who live in my home, will be in 1st and 6th grade. And sales of Advil will rise for all.
The school year brings a lot of structure - too much, I think - to our lives. It's a delicate balance of homework, Hebrew school, play dates, piano lessons, choir performances, teacher conferences, the daily Reading of Shit That Comes Home in Backpacks, the girl drama, the TESTS. Making everyone shower, eat, think, on a schedule. Individualized schedules. And they will like it. THEY WILL. Because we parents work our fingers to the bone, day and night, night and day, and WHAT DO WE GET IN RETURN??? Nothing but cryptic notes from school about lunch money.
Sorry about that, clearly I'm suffering some post elementary school stress disorder and I cannot help the ticks.
In some ways I am very glad they will be moving their little booties into the school. Because I have camp drop off duty in the morning now - and those 25 minutes have become SHEER HELLLLLLLL. The little angels cannot really go 3.5 minutes without starting a new fight.
That's my lunch. No it's not - it's MY lunch.
I'm better at horseback riding than you. No you aren't. Yes I am.
It's my turn to put on the sunscreen! Give it here! No! Noooooo!
You can't bring that stuffed animal to camp! You're not the boss of me!
Get in your seat! I am in my seat!
Mom, she HIT me! No I didn't! Yes you did! Well I didn't mean to. What do you mean... you reached all the way over here and hit me on purpose!!!
Nothing really rivals the precamp drive for picking fights. Everything is really fine and relatively quiet until they climb in the backseat with the camp bags, and then all hell breaks loose. I'm not sure why. I'm thinking of consulting a shaman and seeing if I can scare the poltergeist that's provoking them out of my car. Or sell my car. I think it might be the car. Is that my insanity talking?
4 comments:
What kind of car are we going to be looking at?
Don
Nice one Don. You think its bad with girls try a boy and a girl oh yeah and a toddler who yells Shuuup everytim it starts. Thank god for overhead DVD.
I agree with the overhead DVD - but it's a MUST to get the headphones, too. I swear, it's the only time there is silence between the three kids, except for when they're all asleep.
It also helps is you can yell waaaay louder than them. As in, every time they start, you yell, "STOOOOOP ITTTTTTT" at the top of your lungs. Eventually, it becomes not worth it for them to even start an argument. Works for me!
OK well at least I am not alone. Everyone else on the highway whose kids look so angelic, are actually screaming their lungs out too. I feel marginally better.
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