You know I usually keep my political views off the blog. Because I love each and every one of you regardless of your beliefs, and plus they really aren't the topic of this particular site.
But yesterday I have to say I was more disturbed by the $700 billion Wall Street bailout progress than I was by the election debates. Which is saying something...
The disturbing part of the bailout is not the idea of bailing something out. Though at the core that's also disturbing. In my 20s, I spent too much money when I first started working. Bad budgeting. Did I expect the government to bail me out? Or even my parents? Nope I bailed myself out. It took a few years and some very painful phone conversations, but I did it.
Regardless, I realize that others have always depended on the kindness of strangers, as Blanche so famously said. So I'm never surprised when this talk of bailing out starts up.
In this case, the government is going to find a way to get us some $700 bn further in debt so that Wall Street can be bailed out. Why is this? Well, you can watch CNN and read the Financial Times if you really want to know. I am a human behaviorist - at least for pop culture - for a living, and I believe it's because the demographic of our fine government is a bunch of old white dudes who, like me, cringe when they open up their retirement fund reports. If Wall Street takes a dive, they're retiring poor.
As well, the dudes on Wall Street are like, their best friends? And of the people in the world whom you don't personally want to see suffer, best friends are up there. They've probably been to parties in the Hamptons where their best friends are lamenting the state of things, serving downgraded caviar, and giving pleading puppy dog eyes for help. And who can resist that?
You might be thinking - well, once Wall Street is bailed out they're gonna save our bacon! Those companies are going to revive the economy and make the 401Ks look a whole lot better. Sigh. Still retiring at 65 and that was a close one. I would like to dissent and say I don't think this is going to happen. I think they are all going to dress up in their tuxes on Dec. 31 and give each other an annual bonus and you'll be back up 10% - but not near making up the 40% you're down.
So the government is stepping out on a limb and rescuing its friends. Buy stock in fractional jet companies because that's where the money's going to go.
Meanwhile, everything out of the microcosm of those very wealthy individuals is way out of whack. The average person can't really afford the average tank of gas to get to the average job. This ain't right. We can no longer afford gas, health care, education, and shelter. Um - ok I hate to bring up my job again - but can you say Maslow's hierarchy? If you're worried about your basic needs, you are hobbled in nearly everything else.
Oh wait you say - we were already bailed out! Remember those economic stimulus checks back in the spring? I forget how much that was. $600? That was a $45 bn package from Uncle Sam. So the Maslow's Needs dwellers got less than 10% of what the government is now willing to do for Wall Street and the caviar plan.
I suppose it's our fault because we didn't take the $600 and buy stock - we looked at it and said, hm what can one actually do with $600? Paid the electric bill and bought an ipod.
I'm not angry - I just want a solution. That's what I tell my kids when they bring home a bad test paper. And that's what I will tell these kids.
Here's one solution. I'll go for the Wall Street bailout if they get the corporate equivalent of $600 each. And they have to apply for it and wait like everyone else did.
But actually I have a better solution. Because that first one isn't going to work - because the $600 didn't work for the American people either. So why do something that isn't going to work? That's dorky. We might as well declare National YouTube Day and sit home and watch consumer generated videos - that won't work either, but it's really a whole hell of a lot of fun. (at least the first 20 minutes)
OK here's the idea. We do the freakin bailout. The government wants to spend $700 bn we don't have. Great let's spend it. We'll go halfsies with them. They can spend $350 bn, and we get to spend the rest. With about 301 million people living in this great country of ours, that means we each and every one of us get to decide where about $1200 goes.
The government can give us a list of choices and check boxes. I'm good with that. Long as we get the typical write-in slot.
This way you can send the dollars to the places you feel will most improve your life if they're fixed. Wall Street might have to fend for itself in the face of places you feel impact society.
I'm sure you see the flaws in my plan. I'm sure you see merits and could even make it better.
Well however it works, after you give the government its marching orders, you have to sign up for a volunteer effort. 74% of Americans reportedly volunteer already. But I don't mean volunteering at the school bake sale, important though that may be - I mean volunteer for someone less fortunate than yourself. It doesn't have to be a big deal. Make a sandwich for a homeless guy if that's all you can do.
Because no matter how bad it is, it can always be worse, and you know it. You're reading this on a computer, after all. Probably the computer cost more than the $1200 fictional bucks I just gave you to save the world.
And if we had a country full of people who were making sandwiches for homeless people, we would not be in the shape we're in today - which is a country full of people who know more about what's on YouTube than what's involved in a $700 bn bailout of financial institutions.
OK. I'm done.